Lately it has become common language to ask, "are they facebook official?" If the answer is no, then people assume that the couple is not really exclusive yet and there may still be a chance for someone to swoop in and stir things up a bit. Then there is the counter argument, if someone is listed as "engaged" or "married" on facebook, does that mean they are legally married, or that the girl is sporting a diamond?
Are we moving into a technology based reality, where whatever is on our webpage is to be taken as the truth? Or, are we more skeptical now of what is true because of the internet?
I tend to believe that we are more skeptical now than ever. When we see something on a facebook page or hear a rumor, we immediately go to the internet to find various evidence to either prove or disprove what we have heard. The problem with that however, is that we are simply going back to the internet to try to find facts about something we found on the internet. The internet is full of lies. How can we decipher the facts from the fiction? One thing we can try to do is have more human interaction in real life. This virtual reality is only distancing us from other humans. Sure, I can look at your facebook profile and see what you did last night. I can stalk all my friends on facebook, but then how long is it before they are no longer my friends in real life? There are definitely positives and negatives. It can help you reconnect with an old friend, but you can only see what that person wants you to see. You can only read what they tell you about their day. Why not meet up with them in person and ask how their day is going? That way they are more likely to tell you the truth.
Scenario 1. You just found out your ex is seeing someone new, before you have. You immediately jump onto facebook to do your research. You see that his status only says In a Relationship, but you can't remember if he took it down last week when you did. You check his pictures. He has one with a girl taken two nights ago. Is this her? Oh wait, she commented below it, "That party was so fun!" How come you weren't invited, it must be her. Click on her. Profile is set to private. Darn! But wait, her profile picture is with another guy. Can't be her. Unless that's her brother or something. Back to ex's page. Searching for a wall post. Here's one from her, "Hey did you find my bracelet anywhere, I think I lost it during the party. Let me know! thanks xo." XO! oh man... XO! Do you know what that means? It's gotta be her. I wonder how long they've been dating. Oh wait, heres a post from another girl, "Was nice meeting you in the quad last week, hope to run into you again." Wait, last week? Maybe this is her? Click on her. Awesome, you are in her network and she let's people in her network view her profile, ha, amateur. She's Soooo Ugly. Wow did he downgrade or what? Clicking through her pictures, ok so maybe she's not terrible looking. You see three profile pictures ago she is kissing another guy. Ok, back to her info. She is listed as single. Hum. Skank. This has got to be her. Was she at his party? Back to ex's page. Looking through album titled "Partayyy." She is not in any pictures. But she could have been there. Heres a picture of him with another girl, hey you know that girl. She is in your English Lit class. You are facebook friends, let's see if she's on chat now. She is. Do you write her? What would you say, "Hey are you dating my ex?" You feel like a stalker. You just spent 15 minutes online trying to figure out if he is seeing someone else, and so far, you've got nothing.
Scenario 2. You just found out your ex is seeing someone new, before you have. You text your closest gal pal to see if she's heard the news and ask her advice on what to do. She tells you she has no idea and that you should just call him to find out. Call him? Is that a bad idea? Then he'll know that you still care about him and you will look desperate. Instead, you text him a very vague message hoping he will spill all his wrong doings out to you. You text, "Hey, what's new?" His reply, "nm, u?" Ugh, why do guys have to make you pry the information from their cold bloody hands? "Oh not much, just wondering if you had plans later?" WAIT, why did you send that, he's going to think you want to hang out with him, not that you are trying to figure out if he's going out with someone else. Ugh, too late. He replies, "not really, just hanging out." Great! He isn't seeing anyone, phew, unless, he is hanging out with her. But you can't say, oh who are you hanging out with. So you just reply with a "that's cool." Again, time wasted, and you got nowhere.
Scenario 3. You just found out your ex is seeing someone new, before you have. You know you will run into him at lunch in the dining hall on Wednesday and you will have Bio together right after, maybe you can casually mention it then. Wednesday comes. You see him sitting at a table across the room. There is a group of girls and guys sitting with him. Is one of those girls her? He walks by you to throw away his trash, and he says, "Hey." You reply with, "Hey, did you finish the lab for bio?" He says, "Yea it was a long night last night finishing it up, did you?" "Yea, mind if we compare answers while we walk to class?" "Sure." He walks back to his table. Yes, he can't have another girl, he wants to walk with you! Then you see it, with your own eyes, he walks over to your table hand-in-hand with one of the girls from his table, as she gets closer you realize she is in your bio class too. But they are holding hands, the rumors are true. "Hey, I wanted to introduce you to my..."
Alright, so all of these scenarios are made up, but you have to admit that technology makes a huge difference on the way our life pans out. If we hear something, we should try to confront it straight on, in person, to get the most definitive and true answer. If we approach it from a facebook spy way, like most of us try, we may not be getting the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help us God. If we go the texting route, we are likely to get vague responses to our vague questions and you can never tell someone's tone of voice via text. You never know if someone is being sarcastic or not. If you face your fears head on, you may not like the answer you get, but at least you will know the truth one way or another. So good luck with trying to believe less of what the internet is telling you, because you never know if the author was telling the truth.
xoxo
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