the many scents of New York

On my way to a shoot the other day I realized that New York has many very distinctive and unique scents that you won't find anywhere else. (some of which you'd never want to find)
While walking down one block you can smell fresh made pizzas, fresh cut flowers, and freshly stacked garbage bags. You can smell the odor of someone hiding behind their grocery cart full of random items, smell freshly sprinkled urine on the sidewalk.
New York has some of the best smells, like when walking by bakeries, restaurants, fruit stands and flower markets. They also have some of the worse, like cigarette smoke, body odor that makes you run to a different subway car, garbage piled 6ft high, truck exhaust, urine from people and animals, dog poo that the owner left on the sidewalk, among many other things. Yet, no matter what the smells, we stay in this city because there is nothing else like it. We stay because on the same block as the garbage piles, there is a Halal food truck, a frozen yogurt truck, a taco truck, a candied nuts guy, a fresh fruit stand, a $1 pizza slice joint, and a hundred skyscrapers more glorious and unique and historical than you can find anywhere else in the United States.
New Yorkers love this city for far different reasons than tourists do. We love New York for the variety of international cuisine you can find at any time of day or night, from French crêpes, to Colombian empanadas.
We love this city for the smells, the good ones mostly, but the bad ones too, because we wouldn't appreciate the good ones as much if I weren't for the bad.
We love New York for the snooty clubs that you have to be dressed to impress to get in the door, the dive bars that have a thousand bras on the wall, the streets with a bar every ten feet, and that lone bar on your block that somehow gets packed.
We love the shopping. More designer clothing than anywhere else in the world, and more cheap trendy boutiques than you could ever shop in.
We will pay more for a place with a view of the Hudson, no matter how brown it gets. We go to free outdoor movies, and pay $15 to see one indoors. We find restaurants we love and go back even if the meals are expensive but the food is delicious. We know what days, times, and areas all the tourists will be in and avoid them at all costs. We pay more for used clothes than new sometimes just so we can call it vintage. This is the only part of the country where adult sleepovers happen almost every weekend because taking the subway home to a borough could take two hours after a night of partying so you stay with friends that live close to the bars you went to.
Manhattan is known for bums and skyscrapers, for Times Square, the Empire state building, the Statue of Liberty and the World Trade Center. During your first visit to New York City, do the tourist stuff. Do it all and get it checked off your list. The second time you visit the city, shop in soho and canal street, go out to dinner in a fine restaurant on Park or Fifth ave, walk around in St. Marks place for a casual night, get dressed up and bar hop in the meatpacking district. Don't do anything your tour guidebook tells you to do. Do everything that you ask locals about. It's ok to take a tourist trip, you should. But your second trip, will be how you fall in love with New York City, and all of it's smells.
Xoxo

I'm a damsel

Last week I had a quick brush with fear in the city. After a girls night out, I walked a friend to her subway home and walked towards mine, only one block away. Just as I was about to get out my metrocard, I realized that my wallet wasn't in my purse. I had left it at a friend of a friend's house earlier in the night. We had already taken a cab uptown and the girl who had my wallet was all the way down by little Italy. There was no way I could walk to her apartment 50 blocks away. I couldn't pay for a cab because I had no wallet, and no money. I had no way to buy a subway ride. No way of walking home to Queens, 8 miles away.
I got a quick glimpse of what it feels like to be homeless in a way. They must feel lost, feel desperate, feel like they have no where to turn and no way of getting anywhere. Luckily, being a quick-thinker and problem-solver, and having some good friends saved my night. I walked 9 blocks to my job at Sephora, where the overnight stock guys were working away all night long. One was very nice to lend me $5 to buy a metrocard to get home, and get back into the city during the day to get my wallet. Everything went smoothly for the remainder of the story. I got home safe, got the phone number of the girl who's house my wallet was at, and arranged to pick it up the following day.
Had it been a different night, when there was no overnight employees scheduled, or had I not worked 9 blocks from where I realized I left my wallet, that night could of turned out much worse. I guess the moral of the story is how blessed I am to have the right things fall into place even when something starts to go really wrong. I am also very thankful that I have people in my life willing to step in when I do need help and ask for nothing in return.
As I tried to repay him the $5, he wouldn't accept it, saying that he would get it back in another form some day, in some way, from someone else, alluding to the great wonder of karma. I feel I should do something good to give back since I had the best luck that night and was given the gift of safety, something the majority of us take for granted. Let me know your ideas on what I can do to pay it forward.
Xoxo

trust your gut

They say to "go with your gut," "trust your first instinct," "follow your heart." But, what if you don't know what your gut is trying to tell you? What if you can't hear your own instincts? What if your heart is all jumbled up? How do you make those tough decisions in life that are not so black and white but have so many shades of grey?
I don't have an answer to any of those questions right now, but I'm working on it. My best guess is that, in time, the grey will fade and it will become much more clear what it is you need to do. I mean, they do also say, "only time will tell."
Xoxo

funny subway ads

My favorite thus far have been the humorous ads by Manhattan Mini Storage. You can view a whole bunch of them here: ManhattanMiniStorageAds Here is my favorite.

Another company that has funny ads is ZipCar. Here is the best one:

The subway is filled with funny ads, which is good because New Yorkers have on average the longest commute of any city, and at least we can have a little laugh on the inside when we see a funny ad to make our hour long ride on the subway during rush hour, a little less monotonous.

xoxo

FNO

Video from the Sephora FNO events.



xoxo

The apple doesn't fall very far from the tree.

Whether we like it or not, the majority of us become our parents. Whether you catch yourself saying something that your mom used to always say, or you attempt to bake the family recipe, we all take parts of our parents with us. In a way, we become them. I used to think I was much different than my parents. I thought they made me do too many chores. I thought it was unfair that my dad didn't have to do any work around the house. I thought so many different things while growing up, that have changed. Now, I see that, had they not made me work hard to help out around the house, that I wouldn't be the motivated, independent person that I am today. I would be the person who relies on everyone around me for everything. And now, I can rely only on myself.
The more I date, the more I realize how blessed my parents are. They have stuck together through thick and thin. My mom worked until she had kids, and then she was a stay at home mom while my dad worked. She ran a design/alterations company out of the house part time for many years. She did all of the housework. They are still happily married. Of course they go through rough patches like any other married couple. But, maybe they have it figured out. The secret to living a divorce-free marriage, could lie in the career decisions we make. I decided to think about all my other relatives and see if there was a trend. Do 1950's style mom-stays-home marriages last? Are all of the marriages with two working parents crumbling at their foundations?
So, I did a survey on my facebook page, and here are the results:
Mom stayed home prior to school-age, parents still married: 13
Mom stayed home prior to school-age, parents are divorced: 2
Mom worked prior to school-age, parents still married: 2
Mom worked prior to school-age, parents are divorced: 2

While these numbers do not necessarily represent the general population, I think it does show that more so than not, having a stay at home mom while your children are very young, can be the key to a happy and long marriage. Good luck to you in figuring out what works best for you, but learn from your parents' mistakes and from their successes, because we are more like them than we'd like to admit.
xoxo

Please fill out the poll below, it is completely anonymous, I will never be able to tell who has voted. Thanks for your help in my research of this topic.

Was your mom a stay-at-home mom before you hit gradeschool? Are your parents still married?

• Mom worked, parents are divorced.
• Mom worked, parents are still married.
• Mom stayed at home, parents are divorced.
• Mom stayed at home, parents are still married.

View Results
Acepolls

More polls: Best dating

Let your love go?

There is an old saying that goes something like this: If you love someone set them free. If they come back to you, then they are yours to keep.

I disagree, why would you ever want to let your love go? If you truly love this person, you can't even imagine what life would be like without them. Why try? Let's put this into perspective. Say, you are starting to build a house, and you've got the foundation laid, the frames, roof and walls are up, plumping and electrical is well on its way. Why would you then decide, "you know what, I need to make sure this house is worth living in, so I think I should swing a sledgehammer around, crack up the foundation a bit, poke a few holes in the roof and the pipes and see if we can then go back and continue to build a good, sturdy house." After all, if it can't take a little beating now, it won't be able to withstand the flooding and winds that may happen later. Right? Or, would it make more sense to have a patch-less foundation, pipes without putty-filled holes and walls with strong, solid pieces of wood in them? What do you think?

Same goes for a relationship. You've built a good foundation. You know each other well, but continue to learn new things about each other every day. You spend time together and bond. Now, why crack that foundation, and try to go back to repair it before the flood washes your whole house down? In relationship terms, you should continue to grow together so that you can fight the battles ahead with your strong foundation and love and understanding of one another. If you already cracked up the foundation, and tried to patch it up, it is going to be a long struggle ahead, filled with flooding, and mildew on your winter clothes that you kept in the basement. You get where I'm going with all of this?

Now, imagine you're on the receiving end of this experiment. Your significant other tells you they want to try taking a break, they need space and time to think and see how you react, they want to test a break up, etc, etc. Wouldn't you feel confused, rejected, like you are being tested? Why would you go back to a person who wants to test you and doesn't trust that you love them? Do they even love you? Do they want a break to date other people, should I date other people? See how your significant other may take your experiment the wrong way, and it could end up backfiring very easily?

If you don't love the person you're with, then, by all means, let them go. You are only wasting both of your time by sticking around with someone just out of convenience, and it is really not fair to the other person. But, if you know in your heart that you love them, don't let them go.

I'm going to end this with a whole bunch of really cheesy, romantic garble. At the end of the day, you should hold onto the ones you love, because you never really know what you've got until its gone, and once its gone, there may be no way of getting it back. So, love each other deeply and truly and you will never have a need to see what its like without the other person, because you know in your heart that you couldn't be happier anywhere else. Good luck to those of you who are in love, and to those who aren't, don't rush into it, nothing ever happens naturally in a hurry.

xoxo

New page design

What do you think? Like it more than the old one, hate it, have any comments or suggestions for improvement?

xoxo

Posing for Pictures 101

Here are some tips that every girl needs to know when posing for photos. This is not just for models, but for all women, or all sizes, posing for facebook, yearbook pictures, wedding photos, you name it. These rules apply to all occasions.

1. This is the most important tip I have, so please practice this one. Seriously, whoever told girls that sucking in their tummies would make them appear better in pictures, lied. When trying to appear thin in a photo, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT suck in your stomach and fill your lungs with air. This gives you a very wide, broad, stiff appearance. It virtually erases your neck completely. You have turned yourself into a linebacker with turtle-like neck shrinking capabilities. See exhibit A:

DO however, try to close your rib cage, and flatten your abs. Exhale. This will relax all of the tension in your upper body, tighten your abs, and make your upper body look much less broad. I feel like I am the first one to discover this, because nobody has ever told me this. Please, stop telling your friends and family to suck in their tummies in photos. Try it for yourself!

2. Do not try to camouflage your stomach, thighs, etc by hiding them with your arms. This will make you look wider, more box-y, and draw attention to the very area you are trying to hide.

Instead, Spread out your arms and legs. Create spaces in between them, that a background can show through. This creates a thinness to your arms, legs, and sides. It also draws the eye around the image, instead of looking at your trouble spot. It makes for more interesting photos.

3. Don't lose your limbs. This is modeling 101. The most basic thing to learn is to avoid becoming an amputee. Pay attention to what you are doing in every pose, especially when sitting down.

When trying to show off pockets, It is important to leave either your thumb or your four fingers out of the pocket. Otherwise, you look like you're missing a hand, and it cuts off the long line of your arm.

No:   

Yes:   Yes:

 

4. Neck positioning. You have to be careful when positioning your chin to the camera. Too high, and everyone will see up your nose. Too low, and you suddenly have lost your neck again, you ninja turtle.

Try to keep your chin level to the ground and play with varying angles to the left and right to elongate the neck line without showing everyone your boogers.

5. Don't be stiff, robotic, or do every pose that you saw in some catalog. The photographer will get very bored with you if for every shot you do one right hand on hip, left hand on hip, both hands on hips, repeat. Or, if you are taking facebook pictures, you don't want every picture to be the same couple poses either.

Instead, try poses with movement. Dance. Become an acrobat for an hour. Play with your facial expression. Be goofy, be serious, laugh, smile, cry, etc. Pretend, and become an actor for an hour!

Hope these tips help!
xoxo