I have decided that for one week I will post everything that I spend money on to make myself more aware of what I am spending money on and just how much I am spending. I consider myself to be a saver, always pay my bills on time and I don't really shop very often, however, it can never hurt to be more aware of your bank account. Try this on your own as well. Write down every last penny that leaves your wallet, or car change compartment or coat pocket. This week has been a busy traveling week with a few more expenses than usual because of my birthday and some relative's birthdays, so I will post everything for this week, and probably another week sometime next month to compare.
February 20, 2011
Breakfast pastry $1.29
Various presents/gift cards for Uncle & Cousin's birthdays $48.49
Total for the day: -$49.78
February 21, 2011
Foxwoods for birthday lost $10 gambling
Won $42 gambling
Tip at City Steam $4
Total for the day: +$28
February 22, 2011
Dollar Store trip to buy shower curtain, snacks, baking stuff $8.30
Megabus ticket back to NYC $3.50
Total for the day: -$11.80
February 23, 2011
New pair of heels for birthday $41.74
Sandwich for dinner $6.26
Snack from vending machine at work $0.60
Total for today: -$48.60
February 24, 2011
money spent: $0.00
February 25, 2011
Groceries and snacks for party guests $19.54
February 26, 2011
money spent: $0.00
February 27, 2011
Target for groceries: $28.04
My half of rent for March: $525
Megabus round trip ticket for next trip to CT: $8.50
Got paid back for some household items +$4
total: $557.54
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Can anyone explain something to me?
Why do many girls I know stay with guys who treat them poorly and pass up on guys who put them on a pedestal? Why do they listen to lines they tell, yet ignore what their brains are telling them? Or is it simply that these girls lack some part of the brain that tells them to avoid guys who are more into drugs than they are into treating a lady out to dinner? Or maybe it is that these ladies are not ladies at all, therefore the men are treating them how they should be, or rather, want to be treated?
Food for thought.
I think I blame the girls in most situations for sticking around and not making smarter decisions.
xoxo
Food for thought.
I think I blame the girls in most situations for sticking around and not making smarter decisions.
xoxo
Sunday, February 13, 2011
To the parents who are hurting their children's chance of success:
I thank God that I had parents that made me work. At 16, I had to get a job to pay for my own gas, my own car insurance, and save up to pay for most of my own used car. I had to do laundry, dishes, vacuum, cook every once in a while, take out the recycling every week, etc. I used to complain, sure, but I did it. And now I am glad my parents made me do it because now I can say that I am an adult and I don't need to rely on anyone else to succeed in life. My parents taught me to have drive and determination, something I know I will instill in my children in the future (no kids for a while though). My parents taught me that success is rewarded and failure has consequences. Now I don't need them to call me up and say, have you been trying to do anything with the career you've chosen to move to NYC to pursue, because they know that I am pursuing it with all my might. They know I am out there pounding the pavement, going on castings, and doing what I need to do.
On the other hand, is the parent who never pushed their child to do anything they didn't want to do. The average C student who's parent settled for, "if that's the best you can do honey, then great," instead of, "I know that's not the best you can do." The parent who'd rather be a friend to their child than an authoritative figure. Guess what, Moms and Dads? We don't need any more friends growing up. We have plenty of friends at school. While we are growing up, we need parents, to teach us how to be successful adults in the future. We need you to put your foot down and say, "No. You cannot go out with that loser guy. He is no good and is only going to hurt you." We need you to say, "Finish your paper first and then you can go on facebook." We need you to make us take out the trash and do our own laundry. We need you to slowly but surely, let go. Let go. I can't imagine how hard it is to let your child go and be an adult but you have to do it, or else you are severely crippling them.
How will your child ever learn to push themselves if throughout his or her entire life, you've never pushed them?
This is my case in point.
Parent eases child's pain by feeding them lots of candy and sweets to avoid dealing with the bigger problem. Parent never forces the child to do or not do anything he or she does or does not want to do for fear of conflict or for fear that the child will do it anyway if it is forbidden. Parents do all of the household chores to ease the child's stress and to allow them to focus on school and social development. Parent also does work for the child as they grow to avoid feeling unneeded. Parent continues these same things into the child's adulthood.
Here is the outcome.
Young adult feels an insatiable void. Young adult makes poor choices and has an excuse for every one. Young adult does not know how to make proper decisions. Young adult struggles with becoming an adult and feels the need for a parental figure to guide them. Young adult lacks motivation and struggles to properly complete household chores. Young adult needs to be constantly pushed to complete anything. Young adult lacks common sense. Young adult continues to allow parent to step in to complete the tasks they do not want or do not know how to do.
Then.
Adult finds themselves in troubling relationships and can never seem to have a healthy one. Struggles to survive paycheck to paycheck. May move back in with parent for lengthy periods of time. Adult settles for partners that treat them badly and lives in an uncleanly environment. Adult doesn't take the initiative to further any sort of career, ending up in minimum wage jobs for years to come. Adult lacks motivation to eat healthy, to exercise, to take proper care of one's body. Adult loses friends over the lack of motivation and lack of responsibility. Adult blames others for everything. Adult cannot make wise decisions and ends up confused.
Sooooo, to avoid all of this. Teach your children from a young age, how to cook, clean, do chores, laundry, vacuum, how to scrub the toilet and the floors, how to wash a dish by hand, how to sew, how to repair anything, how to study, how to get good grades, how to fit multiple activities into one day, how to relax, how to make good decisions, how to avoid people that will only bring you down, how to work, how to make a living, how to earn money and save money not to spend it all, how to succeed, how to try and fail and try again, how to face rejection, how to move on, move forward, move up, how to live. Teach your children how to live, before they become helpless adults in a world that eats up the helpless and throws them onto the streets.
To those who've had parents who didn't do their job. You cannot blame them anymore. You have to take responsibility for your actions, and change them. You are the only one in charge of you now. You have to force yourself to get up and do what needs to get done everyday. You are in charge of your destiny and you can only blame yourself if you do not succeed from here on out. There are plenty of tools at your disposal. If you don't know how to do something, learn it. If you don't know how to deal with a situation, seek advice, and deal with the situation.
Or don't. Or fail. Or end up where nobody wants to be; in a dead end job, or jobless, with no skills, with debt up to you earlobes, and no way out.
I hope you can all take this as inspiration to improve your life. It is not meant to tear anyone down and make you feel worse about the way you've raised your children or to make you feel bad for the way you are living your life now as a young adult. This is to tell you that you have an opportunity to change. It is never to late to change the game. Now is the time to shape up, both parents, and children alike. Now is the time to push forward and help each other succeed. Don't be a crutch for one another, but help each other to be independent and successful. Encourage one another, and set the bar high for yourselves. Set goals, and achieve them. Good Luck!
xoxo
On the other hand, is the parent who never pushed their child to do anything they didn't want to do. The average C student who's parent settled for, "if that's the best you can do honey, then great," instead of, "I know that's not the best you can do." The parent who'd rather be a friend to their child than an authoritative figure. Guess what, Moms and Dads? We don't need any more friends growing up. We have plenty of friends at school. While we are growing up, we need parents, to teach us how to be successful adults in the future. We need you to put your foot down and say, "No. You cannot go out with that loser guy. He is no good and is only going to hurt you." We need you to say, "Finish your paper first and then you can go on facebook." We need you to make us take out the trash and do our own laundry. We need you to slowly but surely, let go. Let go. I can't imagine how hard it is to let your child go and be an adult but you have to do it, or else you are severely crippling them.
How will your child ever learn to push themselves if throughout his or her entire life, you've never pushed them?
This is my case in point.
Parent eases child's pain by feeding them lots of candy and sweets to avoid dealing with the bigger problem. Parent never forces the child to do or not do anything he or she does or does not want to do for fear of conflict or for fear that the child will do it anyway if it is forbidden. Parents do all of the household chores to ease the child's stress and to allow them to focus on school and social development. Parent also does work for the child as they grow to avoid feeling unneeded. Parent continues these same things into the child's adulthood.
Here is the outcome.
Young adult feels an insatiable void. Young adult makes poor choices and has an excuse for every one. Young adult does not know how to make proper decisions. Young adult struggles with becoming an adult and feels the need for a parental figure to guide them. Young adult lacks motivation and struggles to properly complete household chores. Young adult needs to be constantly pushed to complete anything. Young adult lacks common sense. Young adult continues to allow parent to step in to complete the tasks they do not want or do not know how to do.
Then.
Adult finds themselves in troubling relationships and can never seem to have a healthy one. Struggles to survive paycheck to paycheck. May move back in with parent for lengthy periods of time. Adult settles for partners that treat them badly and lives in an uncleanly environment. Adult doesn't take the initiative to further any sort of career, ending up in minimum wage jobs for years to come. Adult lacks motivation to eat healthy, to exercise, to take proper care of one's body. Adult loses friends over the lack of motivation and lack of responsibility. Adult blames others for everything. Adult cannot make wise decisions and ends up confused.
Sooooo, to avoid all of this. Teach your children from a young age, how to cook, clean, do chores, laundry, vacuum, how to scrub the toilet and the floors, how to wash a dish by hand, how to sew, how to repair anything, how to study, how to get good grades, how to fit multiple activities into one day, how to relax, how to make good decisions, how to avoid people that will only bring you down, how to work, how to make a living, how to earn money and save money not to spend it all, how to succeed, how to try and fail and try again, how to face rejection, how to move on, move forward, move up, how to live. Teach your children how to live, before they become helpless adults in a world that eats up the helpless and throws them onto the streets.
To those who've had parents who didn't do their job. You cannot blame them anymore. You have to take responsibility for your actions, and change them. You are the only one in charge of you now. You have to force yourself to get up and do what needs to get done everyday. You are in charge of your destiny and you can only blame yourself if you do not succeed from here on out. There are plenty of tools at your disposal. If you don't know how to do something, learn it. If you don't know how to deal with a situation, seek advice, and deal with the situation.
Or don't. Or fail. Or end up where nobody wants to be; in a dead end job, or jobless, with no skills, with debt up to you earlobes, and no way out.
I hope you can all take this as inspiration to improve your life. It is not meant to tear anyone down and make you feel worse about the way you've raised your children or to make you feel bad for the way you are living your life now as a young adult. This is to tell you that you have an opportunity to change. It is never to late to change the game. Now is the time to shape up, both parents, and children alike. Now is the time to push forward and help each other succeed. Don't be a crutch for one another, but help each other to be independent and successful. Encourage one another, and set the bar high for yourselves. Set goals, and achieve them. Good Luck!
xoxo
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
quotes from my current read
So, I am about half way through The Fifth Mountain by Paulo Coelho and decided to share some of my favorite quotes from the book so far with you and I will update this post periodically with new quotes worth reading a second time as I read. Here we go.
Here are some new ones!
"Courage is fear that prays,"
- page 149
"you told me that all life's battles teach us something, even those we lose."
- page 173
The unavoidable always happens.
"You need discipline and patience to overcome it," the shepherd said.
"And hope. When that no longer exists, one can't waste his energy fighting against the impossible."
"It's not a question of hope in the future. It's a question of re-creating your own past."
- page 179
"Can a man cast from his heart the pain of a loss?" asked a woman.
"No. But he can find joy in something won."
- page 212
"A warrior accepts defeat. He does not treat it as a matter of indifference, nor does he attempt to transform it into a victory. The pain of defeat is bitter to him; he suffers at indifference and becomes desperate with loneliness. After all this has passed, he licks his wounds and begins everything anew. A warrior knows that war is made of many battles; he goes on."
- page 212
"Take advantage of the chance that tragedy has given to you; not everyone is capable of doing so."
- page 225
"It's always necessary to know when a stage of one's life has ended. If you stubbornly cling to it after the need has passed, you lose the joy and meaning of the rest. And you risk being shaken to your senses by God."
"The Lord is stern."
"Only with those He has chosen."
- page 238
One afternoon he returned earlier than was his wont, to find the widow sitting in the doorway of the house.
“What are you doing?”
“I have nothing to do,” she replied.
“Then learn something. At this moment, many people have stopped living. They do not become angry, nor cry out; they merely wait for time to pass. They did not accept the challenges of life, so life no longer challenges them. You are running that same risk; react, face life, but do not stop living.”
– page 91
"He thinks the enemy is afraid. He doesn't know that the Assyrian warriors are well trained: when they enter the army, they plant a tree, and every day they leap over the spot where the seed is buried. The seed becomes a shoot, and they leap over it. The shoot becomes a plant, and they go on jumping. They neither become annoyed nor find it a waste of time. Little by little, the tree grows, and the warriors leap higher. Patiently and with dedication, they're preparing to overcome obstacles."
- page 121-122
"Which of us is best at using a sword?" asked one warrior.
"Go to the place where the spy was stoned yesterday," said the commander. "Pick up a stone and insult it."
"Why should I do that? The stone would not answer me back."
"Then attack it with your sword."
"My sword will break," said the soldier. "And that wasn't what I asked; I want to know who's the best at using a sword."
"The best is the one who's most like a rock," answered the commander. "Without drawing its blade, it proves that no on can defeat it."
- page 126-127
"Why must I choose between saving this city and redeeming my people?"
"Because a man must choose," answered the angel, "Therein lieth his strength: the power of his decisions."
"It is a difficult choice; it demands that I accept the death of one people to save another."
"Even more difficult is defining a path for oneself. He who maketh no choice is dead in the eyes of the Lord, though he go on breathing and walking in the streets."
- page 136
"There is no tragedy, only the unavoidable. Everything hath its reason for being: thou needest only distinguish what is temporary from what is lasting."
"What is temporary?" asked Elijah.
"The unavoidable."
"And what is lasting?
"The lessons of the unavoidable."
Saying this, the angel disappeared.
- page 137
Here are some new ones!
"Courage is fear that prays,"
- page 149
"you told me that all life's battles teach us something, even those we lose."
- page 173
The unavoidable always happens.
"You need discipline and patience to overcome it," the shepherd said.
"And hope. When that no longer exists, one can't waste his energy fighting against the impossible."
"It's not a question of hope in the future. It's a question of re-creating your own past."
- page 179
"Can a man cast from his heart the pain of a loss?" asked a woman.
"No. But he can find joy in something won."
- page 212
"A warrior accepts defeat. He does not treat it as a matter of indifference, nor does he attempt to transform it into a victory. The pain of defeat is bitter to him; he suffers at indifference and becomes desperate with loneliness. After all this has passed, he licks his wounds and begins everything anew. A warrior knows that war is made of many battles; he goes on."
- page 212
"Take advantage of the chance that tragedy has given to you; not everyone is capable of doing so."
- page 225
"It's always necessary to know when a stage of one's life has ended. If you stubbornly cling to it after the need has passed, you lose the joy and meaning of the rest. And you risk being shaken to your senses by God."
"The Lord is stern."
"Only with those He has chosen."
- page 238
I am almost done, only a few more pages! Hope these inspire!
xo
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Paulo Coelho
When I first moved to New York a friend suggested I read The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, and since I spend an average of 1.5 hours a day on the subway (a busy day of errands or go-sees I could spend 3 hours or more on trains), I figured, why not fill up that time with some food for thought? After reading the back cover I thought I'd hate it, "Why would I want to read about some boy going through the desert and stuff?" Turns out, its a great book. Full of inspiration and just what I needed to read while starting my journey in New York. I would sit in the subway and mark all the quotes I loved. Some pages would have 3 or 4 quotes on them that I had to remind myself to keep. My facebook statuses were written by Coelho himself for the next month.
I figured it was such a great read, that I'd try another one of his books out. Next I read Veronika Decides to Die. Cheery, huh? It was so thought provoking. I won't give away what happens in it in case you decide to read them but here's this gist of it. Veronika decides she is going to commit suicide, and it delves into her thoughts and justifications of doing so, followed by a variety of plot shifters including insane asylums, nuns, a piano, love, oppression, freedom, several mental illnesses, and in the end of it all, it is a beautifully written piece on human decisions and emotions, well worth reading if you aren't afraid to think before you feel. Thinking is something we should all do more of. Too often we just do what is expected or do what we want instead of what we should. We are selfish and we are self-destructive. We eat whatever we want, drink whatever we want, smoke whatever we want, do whatever we want. We end up unhappy in our situations even though we put ourselves into them. We are there through every step of our own lives, making choices, and we have to live with the outcomes.
Which brings me to my current read. I am now reading The Fifth Mountain, a book about the story of Elijah from the Bible. Yes, I am a Christian, however, I don't know very many Bible stories. I usually only look to my Bible when I am in need of a word from God and I usually open the book and read what is on the page I opened it to, hoping that God will help me to open it to something relevant to my current need. So, I cannot say if what I've read so far is completely in line with what the Bible says. I also don't believe that the Bible tells the story of Elijah for 300 pages, so he must of taken some artistic license. That aside, it is a quick read so far, as is all of Coelho's books. I'd say he writes in a very natural way of speaking, however, he is Brazilian and I believe his books are translated, so whoever translates them does an excellent job as well.
So there you have it. If you are looking for a new book to read to pass the time on your lunch break, on the subway, before bed, or while on the toilet, any of Paulo Coelho's books are highly recommended by me.
Happy Reading.
xo
I figured it was such a great read, that I'd try another one of his books out. Next I read Veronika Decides to Die. Cheery, huh? It was so thought provoking. I won't give away what happens in it in case you decide to read them but here's this gist of it. Veronika decides she is going to commit suicide, and it delves into her thoughts and justifications of doing so, followed by a variety of plot shifters including insane asylums, nuns, a piano, love, oppression, freedom, several mental illnesses, and in the end of it all, it is a beautifully written piece on human decisions and emotions, well worth reading if you aren't afraid to think before you feel. Thinking is something we should all do more of. Too often we just do what is expected or do what we want instead of what we should. We are selfish and we are self-destructive. We eat whatever we want, drink whatever we want, smoke whatever we want, do whatever we want. We end up unhappy in our situations even though we put ourselves into them. We are there through every step of our own lives, making choices, and we have to live with the outcomes.
Which brings me to my current read. I am now reading The Fifth Mountain, a book about the story of Elijah from the Bible. Yes, I am a Christian, however, I don't know very many Bible stories. I usually only look to my Bible when I am in need of a word from God and I usually open the book and read what is on the page I opened it to, hoping that God will help me to open it to something relevant to my current need. So, I cannot say if what I've read so far is completely in line with what the Bible says. I also don't believe that the Bible tells the story of Elijah for 300 pages, so he must of taken some artistic license. That aside, it is a quick read so far, as is all of Coelho's books. I'd say he writes in a very natural way of speaking, however, he is Brazilian and I believe his books are translated, so whoever translates them does an excellent job as well.
So there you have it. If you are looking for a new book to read to pass the time on your lunch break, on the subway, before bed, or while on the toilet, any of Paulo Coelho's books are highly recommended by me.
Happy Reading.
xo
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
If you have 34 minutes
So, granted, I think Kanye West is one of the most racist people in our country, and parts of this video attest to that statement, however, I do think this was a well done video and want to share it. Also, Philip Lim did the costuming so, if only for that, it is worth watching. Some of the visuals captured are amazing to watch, although, sorry Kanye, I know you "wrote" the story and all, but there's not much of a story, there's pretty much no story. However, it is pretty good altogether as a music video not a short film. I hope you enjoy.
xoxo
xoxo
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